I Never Ran So Damn Far

Christopher Burner

Wahiawa, Hawaii

This story is about one of my boar hunts two years ago. My guest for the day, Justin Apa, and me had started walking the main trail early in the morning. This was Justin's first hunt on Oahu. I had warned him that the hunt would be very physical and that it might not be a good hunt for a beginner.

After one hour of walking we hit the cut down trail. My dogs had been putting up their noses earlier and I had told Justin that we had a good chance of catching early. We started to cut down into the main river. When we arrived at the river it looked like a bulldozer had run through it, overturning all the rocks and making huge mud holes. My dogs had disappeared when they hit the river and I told Justin to "keep his ears on" and that the dogs would start barking any minute. After a few minutes the anchor dogs came back, but my main trackers were still out. We started to walk upriver. We came to a mountain apple orchard where the pigs had been routing the night before and I knew that we had a flock on our hands.

I Never Ran So Damn Far


I told Justin to wait at the orchard and I started to walk up the river a few bends to listen. Even though we were only in the river for half an hour it felt like an eternity. We heard one bark and then another. I could see my anchors running upriver and I heard Justin's 245-pound frame stumbling in the same direction .When he reached me he was as red as a beat. I told him to hold on and let the anchors reach their destination. For some reason we weren't hearing the fight, so I told him that we had to run upriver to see what was going on.

As soon as I passed the first bend I could hear them in the distance upriver fighting the boar. Every time we thought we were close the boar would buckle loose and run some more. I lost Justin after the first two bends and my heart was pounding from running so much. It's hard to find traction on river rocks when they are wet so you do a lot of falling. A lot of falling!!!

I Never Ran So Damn Far


Finally, when I came close enough, I could see blood flowing in the water and I prayed that it wasn't the dogs that were bleeding. When I came into sight of the action all I could see was the nine dogs hanging on a black mass of hair and blood all over the place. I pulled out my knife and took the pig to his maker and then I fell to the ground to try to catch my breath. Twenty-five minutes later I was in the same position on the ground when I heard heavy breathing and water splashing. I looked up and saw a fellow that looked just like Justin, but this man had pants legs that were torn off and a shirt that had split down the middle. His knees were bleeding from falling down so many times and his arms were all cut up from the thorn bushes!

I Never Ran So Damn Far


I couldn't help but to start laughing at the sight he made. When he reached me his remark was, "Damn, I never ran so damn far in my life. Next time you're on your own!!!" After four hours of carrying the hog we reached the jeep and after sewing up three dogs with a total of 63 stitches we were all ready to go again the following week!

I Never Ran So Damn Far

Christopher Burner

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