Going Stag by Graham Peters

As hunters and fishermen, we all know someone who doesn’t mind expanding the truth somewhat. The kind of person who would go to just about any length to top you. This story is about one man who did that and a fair bit more.

My father, brother and me were into our third day of whitetail hunting. The hunt was definitely not going as planned and, as a result, the usual bragging and bantering was reaching new heights. We all made statements that, given the way the hunt was going, would probably (and were), prove false.

It was about an hour before closing time and my brother and I were driving down an old logging trail, on our way to pick up our father. We met up with two hunters from British Columbia who were driving out of the same area. They were having the same kind of luck that we were and, as misery loves company, we had lots in common.

The pair from B.C. told us about another hunter they had met up with a few hours back. This unknown hunter had informed them that he had observed a beautiful five-point buck earlier that day but didn\’t shoot because he didn\’t feel up to dragging it out of the bush. Of course, the two from B.C. were polite to the older storyteller, but informed my brother and me that they thought this guy was definitely full of it. They did verify, however, that this same storyteller did have a deer in the back of his truck. They had a funny look on their faces as they said this, which made me curious. I asked the pair whether it was a buck or doe. Their answer was, \”We\’re not sure.\”

Between gales of laughter I was given the sordid story. After this guy had told them about the five-pointer that he had let go he mentioned that he had gotten a deer awhile later and, although it was smaller, he was happy with it. The guys wanted to see it but were met with some opposition to their request. Finally the man gave in and they all went behind the truck to take a look at this \”buck.\” Upon seeing the four-pointer in the back of the truck, they were beginning to reevaluate their first impression of this guy. Then it happened. One of the guys from B.C. grabbed hold of the antlers in order to get a better look. Much to his surprise the antler came off. He didn\’t know what to say to the man who now had a very unusual rack. He started to apologize for breaking his buck but stopped when he noticed something hanging from the antler. It was a long length of string.

A closer look revealed that the other side of the rack was also tied on. An even closer examination revealed that this buck with the tied on antlers was actually a doe. The pair, thinking that this surely must violate some hunting law, quickly left the man while he attempted to tie the rack back on the doe\’s head. I told them it was not illegal to shoot the doe but some speculation must be given to the sanity of anyone who would then try to convert it to a buck. Even though I was hesitant to do so, I asked the pair for a description of the truck that this bi-sexual deer was in. As they gave the description I looked at my brother, then back to them and said, \”Well it was nice to meet you. By the way, my name is Graham, this is my brother Wade, and you have already met my dad.\”

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